Finding Mrs. Wright Read online

  I leaned back to dodge her finger. “What are you talking about?”

  “All this talk about wanting the best for Brianna is really you trying to get out of paying child support. You want to get her on Saturdays and Sundays so you can say she’s not spending time with me so you don’t have to pay.” She folded her arms and paced into the dining room and then back over to me. “Coming over here with some trifling, deadbeat, baby daddy mess.”

  I stood up and looked down at her. “That’s not at all what this is about. Did I say anything about cutting your check?”

  “The other day, you said—”

  “You think this is about some stupid money? Is that all you care about?”

  “You just trying to get out of your responsibility.”

  “My responsibility is to my daughter, not to you.”

  “That’s how I know you trying to get out of paying me. If you take her, then you gon’ say that you don’t need to pay no child support.”

  I threw my hands in the air. “I cannot believe this.” I clamped my lips together hard to keep from telling her how crazy, materialistic, and insane she was. That would only lead to one of our long shouting matches.

  I paced around her living room for a second, forcing myself to calm down. It didn’t matter what approach I tried to use with Shauntae, she was just too crazy to make sense. I needed to say what I needed to say and get out of there. I came back to where she stood with her arms folded and a big scowl on her face.

  “Let’s make a deal, okay?” I said. “I will continue to pay Brianna’s child support, the full amount. Brianna will be with me on Saturdays and Sundays. You’ll still have her on Friday nights, and when she’s here, you won’t have any dudes in the house. And I’ll continue to pay you six hundred dollars a month in child support.” I added that again at the end for emphasis.

  She narrowed her eyes, considering my offer. “And after two months, you won’t be trying to stop paying child support since she’s with you most of the time?”

  “As long as you don’t have any men around my daughter, the check will continue. The minute I find out that she’s heard you having sex again, it ends.”

  She pressed her lips together. “A’ight. You got a deal.” She extended a hand to shake on it.

  As I shook her hand, all I could think was, what kind of woman is she?

  She followed me to the door and put a weak smile on her face when I opened it to leave. “You think you might go ahead and give me the check today? That way I know you plan on keeping your end of the deal.”

  “I’ll give you your check when I pick up Brianna next Saturday morning. It’ll be the first. I’ve never been late with your check and there’s no reason to think things will be any different now.”

  She rolled her eyes but didn’t press the issue. She was probably glad to have such a sweet deal. $600 to have her child one evening a week. I was crazy to agree, but if it was the price I had to pay to give my daughter a normal life, I would just have to pay it.

  Seven

  For the next couple of weeks, me and Brianna adjusted to our new routine. I’d pick her up at her mother’s on Saturday morning—of course, not bathed and unfed—take her home, get her ready, and then drop her off at arts class at the church. Thankfully, it was a full-day program so I could still get a lot of stuff done on Saturday. After the program, we’d go for ice cream or to McDonald’s or somewhere else she liked. We’d sit around for the rest of the evening, either watching TV or a movie, or playing some of her board games.

  Sunday mornings we’d go to church and then, afterward, to my parents’ house for dinner. I was turning into a full-time family man. Since I wasn’t involved with anyone, it was working out pretty well. In fact, it may have been what was keeping me from getting tangled up with the next woman—not hanging out with my boys in places where single women were ready and available. Chuckie was spending more and more time with Tisha, so he wasn’t complaining, and AJ was always with his family anyway.

  And Brianna was very happy. On Sunday mornings, she’d come and jump on my bed and bug me until I woke up. I’d get revenge by tickling her until she screamed for mercy. Then we’d talk about her week. Cassandra and her art classes were becoming a frequent topic of conversation. Brianna couldn’t just tell me what she’d learned. She had to demonstrate—singing, dancing, and acting—putting on full performances like my room was a Broadway stage. And her new favorite phrase was, “Miss Cassandra says . . .”

  I thought it was cute. And it was a good thing for her to have a positive female role model in her life other than my mother.

  Me and Cassandra managed to spend a little time trading jabs before and after children’s church and arts class. I noticed that no matter how many parents or kids she was attending to, she’d always hold up a finger to let me know to wait. Then she’d make everybody else wait while she talked for a while with me. Not for too long, but long enough to always make me laugh, and long enough to make me wish I could have a little more of her time.

  I felt like she was sending me mixed signals—one time she’d be flirty and throw the door open for me to ask her out, and then other times that sassy mouth of hers would say all sorts of smart stuff to keep me at arm’s length. Both of us seemed to be enjoying the game, but I knew if things were going anywhere, it was going to be up to me to take it there.

  I wrestled back and forth with whether to get involved with her, especially because of her relationship with Brianna. I finally decided that it would be cool to spend more time with her, just to hang out and see what happened. I’d be careful not to get too involved this time.

  One Saturday when I came to pick up Brianna, the church secretary directed me to the playground behind the church. When I went outside and found the class, the kids were standing still in funny positions. Cassandra was explaining to them how to become a tree or a flower. She didn’t see me when I first walked out there and I stood for a minute, watching her strike all sorts of poses. She made for a very sexy tree or flower or whatever it was she was supposed to be.

  She laughed when she saw me and looked down at her watch. “Okay, time to go, guys. Walk, don’t run, back to the classroom and get your stuff and wait for your parents.”

  Two teenagers herded the kids back inside and Cassandra came over to where I was standing. Brianna came running up at the same time. “Hey, Daddy!” She grabbed me around the waist and leaned back to look up at me. “Can I play on the swings for a while?”

  I picked her up by the arms and bicep curled her upward and planted a kiss on her forehead. “Yes, Brianna. Just stay where Daddy can see you, okay?”

  She and a boy who looked about her age ran off and started fighting over one swing. I didn’t know why they both needed to get on that particular swing since there were four others. Had to be one of those kid things.

  Cassandra gave me one of her firm handshakes. “So wassup, playa? You good?”

  I nodded and we walked a little closer to the swing set, in case I needed to break up a fight. “I’m good. I was enjoying your tree lesson.” I stopped and struck a tree pose, mocking her.

  She laughed. “How long were you standing there?”

  “Long enough to learn a little something.” I struck another pose and she cracked up laughing again. Something about the sound of her laugh did something tome.

  I gave her my most charming smile. “So, you gonna save me a seat in church tomorrow?”

  Cassandra stopped dead in her tracks. She frowned for a second and then her mouth formed a small grin. “Now, Devon, why would I want to do that?”

  I shrugged. “It’s not a big deal. You said you did children’s church every other week, so I figured . . .” It wasn’t like I was asking her out on a date or something.

  “It is a big deal.”

  “Why? It’s just church.”

  “It’s so much more than just church.” Cassandra put a hand on her hip. “Think about it. I’m an attractive, single woman in a church o
f ten thousand members. Let’s do the math.” She pulled out an imaginary calculator and punched in some numbers. “Subtract out the women, the married men, the dating-but-not-married men, the dogs, and don’t forget about the gay men . . .” She punched in a few more numbers on her calculator and then held it up for me to see the results. “If I sit with you in church tomorrow, I’ve just cut off my chances with at least fifteen hundred of Atlanta’s most eligible and finest bachelors. Now why would I want to do that?”

  I laughed out loud. “Girl, you crazy.”

  “I’m oh-so-serious, Devon. This is the ATL. A girl’s gotta play it smart. The only man who needs to be sitting next to me in church is my man.”

  “Wow, it’s like that?”

  “Please believe.” Cassandra started strolling again and I followed her.

  It was a perfect fall day. Cassandra had on an orange sweater that matched the leaves falling from the trees. If I didn’t have my daughter, it would be a nice day to throw a football around with some of the guys.

  Now Brianna and her little friend were trying to play on the seesaw. The boy had a good ten pounds on her so she ended up stuck in the air, jerking her legs, trying to get the seesaw to go down.

  I asked Cassandra, “So you are looking for a man, then?” Why was I asking her that question?

  “Of course. I can’t keep all this love and beauty to myself.” She threw her arms in the air in a diva-esque pose. “I’m a beautiful gift that God wants to give to some very blessed man.”

  “Is that a fact?” I asked.

  I walked over to the seesaw and gently pushed Brianna’s side down. The boy looked happy for a chance to be in the air. I slowly let Brianna go until she was in the air again and pushed them up and down for a while until they got bored and decided to move on to the next play area.

  I walked back over to Cassandra. “So . . . you never answered my question about why a beautiful woman like yourself is still single.”

  “That’s because your punk behind never answered when I asked you first.”

  “Dang, girl, why you gotta be so cold?”

  She flashed me that pretty smile of hers and it made me want to be the man my father was talking about. Why didn’t I just man up, step to her, and be in a real relationship?

  “You go first. Then I’ll answer.” What was I gonna tell her?

  She put her hands on her hips and stared at me. “Are you just being nosy or are you asking for a reason? ’Cause you don’t need to be all up in my business unless you’re asking for a reason.” She strolled a little farther and I wondered if she purposely rolled her hips or if that was the way she naturally walked.

  I had to focus my eyes upward before I answered her. “I might be asking for a reason.”

  “Might be?” She stopped and turned to me. “See, playa, that there don’t work for me. Either you is or you isn’t. Let me be real and tell you about me.”

  I grinned at her but realized from the look on her face that she was being serious.

  “Maybe the reason I’m still single is that I don’t want to play the game anymore. I’m tired of meeting guy after guy after guy and kickin’ it for a while and ending up on a road going nowhere. So now I make it clear up front. I’m not trying to be your girlfriend.” She leaned up real close to me. “I’m the marrying kind.”

  “Whoa, now.” I held up my hands and stepped back. “Yeah, I can see where that can keep you single. That’s the best way I know of to scare a brother off. Talking about marriage from the gate like that.”

  “Good. ’Cause if a man ain’t the marrying kind, I’m trying to scare him off. I ain’t got no more time to waste. Three times in the last eight years I thought I was gonna get married. And I’m still Cassandra Parker. Do you know how much time that is? How much energy that is? It gets old and tired after a while. My heart can’t take no more. So if a man ain’t serious, he don’t need to step to me.”

  “Hmph.” I waved at Brianna, who was waving madly at me from beside the merry-go-round. She and the boy had just spun around on it for too long. They got off and staggered around until they both fell down in the dirt.

  “I know, right? I’m a whole lot,” Cassandra said. “It’s not like I expect a ring and a proposal on the first date. I need some time to get to know somebody before I even think about spending the rest of my life with him. But I gotta know that marriage is on his mind. I don’t understand a grown man wanting to ‘just kick it.’ That’s junior high stuff right there.”

  Ouch. I stroked my chin. “So three times in eight years. What happened? I mean, since we’re talking and all.”

  “What I tell you about being up all in my business?” Cassandra gave me a sassy stare. She stood there for a few seconds; then her face became more serious. “One guy had serious commitment issues. We were great together but he didn’t want to be in a serious relationship, let alone think about marriage. The next guy was a really great guy, but he wasn’t saved. He pretended to be to get next to me but then as we got closer, I realized he wasn’t really a Christian. He was just saying all the right things ’cause he thought he was gonna get in my pants.”

  She turned away from me and walked toward the small lake behind the playground, her voice much quieter. “The last guy was amazing in every way I could want, but he had some toxic baby mama drama that ended up breaking us up. It really broke my heart because I loved him something terrible. We tried to make it work but his baby mama was cuckoo crazy . . .” Cassandra stared into space.

  Dang. Struck out before I even stepped up to bat. I was her last three heartbreaks all wrapped up in one.

  She turned toward me and stepped close. “So what’s it gonna be, Devon Wright? You trying to be somebody’s Mr. Right?”

  I took a step back before I even realized what I was doing. “I . . . I honestly don’t think I can be what you need right now, so . . .”

  She smiled. “And see, this is why my method works. Because now we don’t have to waste each other’s time.”

  I nodded and shoved my hands in my pockets. I felt like a punk for real. But she was right. Why waste her time? Even if I was trying to be committed, which lately was starting to sound like a good idea, I wasn’t no serious church dude like it sounded like she wanted. And I couldn’t imagine anyone having crazier baby mama drama than me.

  “Thanks for being honest with me. Takes a real man to do that.”

  Brianna came running up. “Daaaaaaaddy, I’m hoooon-gree,” she sang.

  Me and Cassandra both laughed. “Okay, baby girl. Let me get you some food.”

  “Can we get some McDonald’s?”

  “I’ll think about it.”

  “Yaaay.” She screamed like me thinking about it was a yes. Me and Cassandra followed her in silence toward the parking lot.

  Cassandra gave Brianna a hug before she got into the car. “You did great today, Miss Lady. I’ll see you next week?”

  Brianna’s smile couldn’t have been happier as she nodded her head real big.

  “Strap yourself in, baby girl.” I waited until Brianna’s booster seat belt clicked, and then I shut her door. I didn’t quite know what to say to Cassandra.

  We stood there in awkward silence for a few seconds and then she finally extended a hand to me. “See you around, Devon Wright.”

  “Take care, Cassandra Parker.” I held her hand for a few seconds, not wanting to let go but knowing I had to. I got into the car and she walked back into the church building.

  As we were driving away, I asked Brianna, “So how was class?”

  I zoned out as she proceeded into a lengthy chatter about her morning. All I heard was “Miss Cassandra this” and “Miss Cassandra that.” I interjected some “uh-huh’s” and “really, baby girl’s?” every few minutes to show that I was listening. After a few minutes, there was silence from the back seat and I realized she had asked me a question.

  “What’s that, sweetie?”

  “Daddeeeeee . . .” She let out an exasperated
breath and pouted at the fact that I hadn’t been listening to her.

  “Sorry, baby. What’d you say?”

  “I said . . .” She folded her arms across her chest. “Are you gonna get me a real mama?”

  My mouth fell open and I stared at her in the rearview mirror. “What?”

  “Well, since I don’t hardly have to stay at Mama’s house no more, I thought you might be getting ready to get me a real mama.”

  My stomach sank. “What’s a real mama, Bree?”

  “You know. A real mama like all the other kids at my school and at the church have. A mama that takes you places and hugs you and kisses you and talks to you and is real nice to you. A real mama that would love me like Gammy loves you.” She looked at me looking at her in the rearview mirror. “How come you didn’t get me a real mama before, Daddy?”

  I felt like Brianna had stabbed me in the heart. What in the world was I supposed to say to my daughter? I had to know this conversation would come up one day. Did it have to be right after my conversation with Cassandra?

  “Daddy is so sorry about that, Bree baby. Daddy made some bad choices and decisions before you were born.”

  “You mean when you were picking me a mama?”

  “Yeah, Bree. When I was picking you a mama.” I wondered if that was the wrong thing to say. No matter how crazy Shauntae was, I never wanted to speak badly about her to her daughter.

  Brianna sat and thought for a minute. “That’s okay, Daddy. Like you always tell me, whenever you make a mistake, learn a lesson and do better next time, right?”

  I had to chuckle. “Yes, baby. Learn the lesson and do better next time.”

  Brianna was silent in the back seat for a few minutes and I wondered what was going through her mind. I didn’t have to wonder too long.

  “So you could still get me a real mama, huh, Daddy? Some of my friends . . . they mamas made a mistake when they was picking them a daddy, like you made a mistake when you was picking me a mama. But then when they picked again, they got them a real good second daddy. So you could learn from your mistakes and get me a real good mama this time, right?”