Selling My Soul Page 16

  “You understand the decisions I made?”

  I nodded again. “Come on, old lady. Let’s get you home.”

  “Actually I thought we’d stop by my house to pack my bag so I can go to Silver Spring with you.”

  My eyes widened.

  “Tree, please. I ain’t gon’ die at your house. I promise. I still got some stuff left to do.” She picked up her purse and paperwork the nurse left with her. “Right now, I need to see about my baby.”

  Twenty-one

  When we got to my house, of course Tiffany wasn’t there. I hadn’t talked to her since Sunday night when she called. I couldn’t believe she hadn’t even tried to contact me to see how Moms was doing.

  I got Moms settled into Tiffany’s room upstairs. It was still fairly clean, and I straightened up the few piles of clothes on the floor and took the dirty dishes downstairs. Tiffany could sleep on the futon in my little prayer room at the end of the hall when she came home. If she came home.

  After making sure there was decent food in the house for Moms to eat, I took a long, hot bath and lay in my bed for a while. The softness of it relaxed me, and I prayed for sleep. After a few good hours of deep, dreamless sleep, my cell phone rang.

  I sat up and shook myself awake, glancing down at the caller ID.

  “Blanche, hey. Have you heard anything yet?” I tried to sound wide awake.

  “Nothing, except that things are delicate because it involves a young boy. The DA’s office is keeping things tight to protect his identity. It will probably be a day or so more before they complete the investigation, then they’ll release the information. I spoke with Bishop Walker and told him to lay low, not saying anything to anybody about anything, and that we would call him when we know something. He shouldn’t be bothering you.”

  “Thanks, Blanche. You didn’t have to do that.”

  “I know he’s not your favorite person in the world, so I figured I’d take care of it.”

  “Thanks.” What was wrong with her? I hoped she wasn’t buttering me up for some other awful client she wanted to unleash on me.

  “No problem. Spend some time with your mother. I trust she’s well?”

  “Much better, thank you. I brought her home with me.” So that was it. She was still feeling guilty about how she acted the day Moms went to the hospital.

  “Good. Take a few days. You can keep doing everything from home like you have been. If anything pressing comes up, I’ll call.”

  “Thanks, Blanche.” I stared at the phone like I had just finished talking to an alien rather than my boss. I decided to thank God for the blessing and sank back into the bed.

  The phone rang again with some Virginia number I didn’t recognize. I didn’t answer it and let it go to voice mail. I’d check it later. Even if it was Tiffany, I didn’t feel like talking to her right now. If she were that worried about Moms, she could come home and find out what was going on for herself.

  The cell phone rang again with the same Virginia number. Curiosity wasn’t enough to make me answer. I turned the ringer off and rolled over in the bed. A few minutes later, I heard Moms’s cell phone ring. I wondered if it was Tiffany. I knew it wasn’t a few minutes later when I heard her cackling and talking like it was an old friend. If it was Tiffany, she’d be cussing.

  A few minutes later, I heard her knocking on my door. “Tree, you sleep?”

  “No, come on in.” I sat up on the side of the bed. “Who was that you were talking to?”

  She frowned. “What I tell you about being grown? You don’t need to be all up in my business.” She came over and sat down on the edge of my bed. “Why don’t we get dressed up all cute and go get something to eat?”

  I crossed my eyes and flopped back on the bed. “You can’t be serious. Aren’t you tired?”

  “Tired of being cooped up inside. Tree, I went to the hospital like you asked me to and stayed there and behaved myself. I just had a good, long nap. Now I want to get dressed up and go out somewhere.”

  “Are you sure you’re feeling up to it?” I studied her. Her breathing was pretty normal, but she looked kind of pale, and her eyes seemed more sunken than before.

  “Yeah. I need some sunshine and fresh air.” She grabbed my shoulder. “Come on here. You heard the doctor. The most important thing is for me to enjoy my last days. Don’t you want me to be happy in my last days, baby?”

  “Moms, give me a break. Don’t be running no guilt trips on me. You ain’t going nowhere no time soon.”

  She tickled my side until I sat up in the bed again. “Come on. Let’s get dressed up real pretty. I’m feeling special. Don’t put on no jeans either. Put on something snazzy and do something to your hair and put some make-up on.”

  “I don’t feel like all that, lady.” I was happy that she felt good enough to want to dress up and go out like we used to, but I was exhausted from the past few days. I was also concerned about what the next few days would hold. Once whatever the evidence was got released, I knew there would be a lot going on.

  “Just do it, Tree. For me, okay?” She walked out my door and closed it behind her.

  I threw my legs over the side of the bed to make myself get up. I decided to be thankful that she was feeling better enough to be getting on my nerves. I pulled open my closet door, looking for something to wear. A couple of my suits that Tiffany had taken out of my closet were back. I pulled them out and looked at them. There were darts in the waistlines of the skirts and pants. I tried one on, and it fit perfectly. Somehow the jackets fit perfectly too. I didn’t know what Tiffany had done, but my clothes fit like they were tailor made.

  Next to the suits hung a dress I hadn’t seen before. Its springy peach color would complement my skin perfectly. It was a straight shell, with darts from the breast to the waist. It was simple, yet elegant and short enough to show off my long legs. The tag in the collar said “Designs by Stacy”. When I put it on and walked over to my dresser mirror, I couldn’t help but smile. It was perfect. And it looked great on me.

  Moms poked her head in the door just as I was turning around to look at myself in the mirror. “Well, now. Don’t you look like something special. Where you get that dress?”

  “Tiffany’s friend Stacy made it. She and Tiffany altered some of my suits too. They came out perfect. Looks like Tiffy and Stacy may finally be on to something.”

  Moms walked over to me to inspect the dress. She had put on a cute, black baby doll dress that somehow hid how pitifully thin she was. “Nice.” She grunted. “I’m still gon’ tear her tail up when she gets here.”

  I rolled my eyes, knowing all Tiffany had to do was tell some pitiful lie and Moms would melt.

  “Don’t be rolling your eyes at me. Now go fix up your hair and your face. Hurry up. I’m almost ready.”

  I put a little oil on my hair and brushed it back, then fastened on the bun. I hoped Tiffany would come out of hiding long enough to braid my hair this weekend. We could fight later. I needed to get something done to my head. I took my time carefully applying make-up, keeping it as natural as possible.

  When I finished, I went to find Moms. She was in the hall bathroom, putting on some bright red lipstick. She walked into the guestroom and came back with the capelana skirt I had bought her. She handed it to me. “Here. Make me look pretty.”

  I carefully tied it around her head. Just as she was admiring herself in the mirror, the doorbell rang. I looked at her. “You expecting somebody?”

  She shrugged. “Might be that durn sister of yours. Maybe she lost her key. If it’s her, I get first licks. You can have her when I’m done with her.”

  I walked down the steps, calling back up to Moms, “It’s too late to beat her now. We shoulda been beating her when she was little.”

  I swung open the door, ready to give Tiffany a good fussing.

  Instead of my baby sister, Gabriel Woods stood in my doorway.

  Twenty-two

  I stood there frozen. “Gabe . . .” He held his arm
s open, and I jumped into them. He held me tight for a few minutes, and then pulled away from me. He bent to kiss me, and I remembered how sweet his lips were. He finally stood back, holding me at arms length. “Wow, you clean up well. You look even more amazing when you’re not covered with red dirt and sand.”

  I laughed.

  He looked me up and down. “My beautiful angel.”

  I looked him up and down as well. “Look at you.” I had never seen him clean and shaven. I was used to him with stubbly facial hair and a wild afro he couldn’t seem to tame. The women of the village used to cut it with a large knife, but it never came out even. He was dressed in a pair of khaki slacks and a white, starched, button-up shirt. With his close haircut, sharp angular features, jet black skin and tall, lanky frame, he looked like a Calvin Klein model. More striking than actually handsome.

  He pulled me to him again, and we both sighed and said at the same time, “You smell so good.” We hung on to each other, laughing.

  I laid my chin on his shoulder with my arms still around him. “Gabe,” I breathed out his name. “What are you doing here?”

  He pulled back and looked at me. “You called. I came.” His facial expression and tone let me know he thought it was a ridiculous question.

  “But I called and left a message with Zembala for you not to come.”

  “I was probably already on my way to Johannesburg by then.”

  I stared at him in wonder. “I can’t believe you came.”

  He looked hurt. “You can’t? Could you imagine anything that would keep me away if you needed me? I would have sprouted wings and flown across the ocean myself if I had to.”

  I laughed and traced the outline of his jaw with my finger. “But how did you get here? How did you find me? When did you get all cleaned up and fine?”

  He laughed and traced my lips with his finger. “I actually got in last night. I meant to call you then, but by the time my cousin picked me up at the airport, I was so tired, I didn’t even know my own name. I got up early this morning, and he took me to get clothes and get my hair cut and all that good stuff. He let me borrow his car. Driving was . . . whew.”

  He ran a hand over his head like he missed his wild hair. “I’ve been calling you all day, but you didn’t answer. I had brought your emergency contact numbers with me and called your mother’s cell phone. She is something else. I can’t wait to meet her.”

  “Is that my son-in-law out there?” Moms walked over to the door where me and Gabe still stood, hanging on to each other. “Ain’t you gon’ invite him in?”

  She reached out to hug Gabe and held on to his arm. “Come on in, baby. I promise I raised her good. I don’t know why she’s acting like she ain’t got no home training.” She led him into the house, shaking her head at me.

  Moms smoothed a hand across Gabe’s face. “Ain’t you a fine something. You two make a beautiful couple too. Look like something out of a magazine. All tall and fashionable looking.”

  “Moms, please.”

  “Don’t even start, Trina. You’ve known me too long to be getting embarrassed by anything I say.” She led Gabe into the living room and sat him on the couch, and then indicated for me to sit next to him while she sat in the armchair. “Trina, ain’t you gon’ offer the man something to drink?” She rolled her eyes and shook her head at Gabe.

  I didn’t bother to ask what he wanted. I walked into the kitchen, grabbed a bottle of water and a tall glass of ice and brought it to him. He smiled as he accepted it, like he knew I understood what a precious gift I had just brought him.

  “So you are well—Ms. Michaels, is it?” Gabe asked my mother and turned to me like he should know her name.

  She reached over and squeezed his arm. “You can call me Moms, baby. I’m feeling fine. Trina made me stay in the hospital for a few days, but I’m much better now.”

  I narrowed my eyes at her, but didn’t bother to say anything.

  Gabe smiled at her. “I’m glad you’re doing better. I trust that you’ll let me pray for you while I’m here, yes? We wouldn’t want to let that cancer continue to have any place in your body.”

  “Of course, baby. Anything for my son-in-law.”

  This time my mouth fell open.

  “Close your mouth, Trina. Wouldn’t want nothing flying in there. You just let me know when, Gabe. I’ll be ready.” Moms stood. “Well, I’m gon’ get out your way so you can spend some time together.” As she slowly ascended the stairs I heard her say, “Now I can die in peace.”

  “Not today, Moms. Okay?” I yelled after her.

  When she was out of earshot, I said, “Please forgive me for my mother’s behavior. I don’t know where she got this habit of calling you son-in-law.”

  “No reason to apologize. I rather like the way it sounds.” He took my hand in his. “Don’t you?”

  I smiled and leaned my head against his shoulder. “I’m so sorry you came all this way and nothing’s wrong. I should have called you back sooner.”

  “Are you not happy to see me?”

  “Of course I’m happy to see you. Especially looking so good. I just feel bad that you spent so much money and went through all this trouble for nothing. Moms is fine. Well, for now anyway.”

  “First of all, the money means nothing if you needed me to be here. And if you were upset enough to call in the state you were in, then it’s not for nothing. And what do you mean for now anyway?”

  I explained our conversation with the doctor in Moms’s hospital room before I brought her home. He took it all in, listening intently as I described how sick she was and that she had been released under hospice care to die. “If something happens, I can’t even take her back to the hospital. I just have to watch and let her—”

  “My dear, in a little while, we’ll pray for your mother, and all this cancer rubbish will be finished.”

  “That’s just the thing. Until you asked her, she hasn’t been willing to let me pray for her. I think she just agreed to let you pray to make you happy. I’ll be shocked if she really does.” I told him about me and Moms’s conversations since I’d been home.

  “What does your mother have against God?”

  I shrugged and shook my head, not wanting to have that conversation with Gabe. “And we haven’t seen Tiffany. I don’t even know where she is.” I told him about Tiffany’s recent behavior, the wad of money she gave me and the fact she admitted she was seeing a drug dealer. “When I talked to her when I was at the hospital, she was drunk. Moms yelled at her, and we haven’t heard from her or seen her since. I hope she’s okay, but who knows.”

  He nodded, listening to everything I said. “Tiffany is unsaved, yes?”

  “She has basically the same attitude as Moms when it comes to God.”

  “And you don’t know where either of them got it?”

  I looked down and intertwined my long fingers with Gabe’s.

  “Or you do and you don’t want to talk about it?”

  I nestled my head into his neck and let out a deep breath.

  “What else is bothering you?”

  “Huh?”

  “What was it that you were about to tell me on the phone when I called you that night, but then you decided not to tell me?”

  I looked up at Gabe and smiled. I kissed his cheek. “I love you.” I snuggled back against his shoulder.

  He kissed the top of my head. He smoothed his fingers across my hair. “What happened?” He fingered the fake bun at the back. “What is this?”

  I laughed. “Tiffany pressed it for me.”

  “Pressed it? So it’ll go back, yes?”

  “Yes. Why, you miss the afro?”

  “Terribly.” He stroked my arm softly with his fingertips. “Are you going to tell me the rest, Trina?”

  “Do I have to? I’m enjoying being with you.” I wrapped an arm around his waist.

  “And you won’t enjoy being with me if you tell me?” He pulled away from me a little so he could see my face.

>   “I’m afraid you’ll be upset with me.” I looked down at our hands and held his tighter.

  “What could make me so upset that you would not enjoy being with me anymore?” He gently lifted my chin so I would have to look at his face. “Nothing could ever make me not love you. You know that.”

  I got up and went to the kitchen to get him another bottle of water and a glass of ice. He followed me, asking where the bathroom was. I pointed him down the hall. “Don’t forget to flush.”

  He laughed.

  When we both came back to the couch, instead of curling up against him, I sat facing him so I could look in his eyes when I talked. I told him everything, starting with Monica’s discovery two weeks before I left for Africa up until the present with my recent interactions with Bishop Walker. As he always did, Gabe listened intently without speaking.

  When I finished telling him everything, Gabe got up and paced the floor. I sat there biting my lip, waiting for him to talk. My heart needed him to say what he was thinking.

  “I don’t understand,” he finally said.

  “Don’t understand what?” I asked.

  “Why you would think you would need to take that job when you first got back?”

  I frowned. What part didn’t he understand about mom’s bills and mine? I started to explain again, but he held up his hand.

  “Just as you called me to come, all you had to do was call and tell me about the money. You know I would have had it wired to you immediately. You never would have had to set foot in that man’s office.”

  I shook my head. “Gabe, you know I could never ask you to—”

  “And why not, Trina?” He came over to the couch where I still sat and knelt in front of me. “Why is it so difficult for you to let me love you?”

  I stared at him. “Because I wouldn’t call to ask you for thousands of dollars means I won’t let you love me?”

  He nodded. “And so many other things. You feel as if it was too much to ask for me to come here when you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. Even in Mieze, for you to allow the slightest vulnerability and for me to be a man to you requires the severest conditions. Why must a child die or there be a flood or your mother almost die for you to need me? When everything is fine, you push me away. It’s only when you’re desperate that you’re able to admit how much you love me. I can’t bear this push and pull, back and forth with you any longer. I love you, Trina. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But you’re unable to believe that I could love you that much. Or unable to receive that love. Or unable to love me back.”